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Bush announces running mate for 2004: Osama Bin Laden
By Justine Doody
In light of the ineffectual performance of the current Vice President, Dick Cheney, President Bush has announced his surprise running mate for the 2004 Presidential Elections: Osama Bin Laden.
Bush urged voters not to judge the former terrorist too harshly:
“Sure, we’ve heard a lot of stuff about Sam being a little wild, but that’s all over now. We were friends and business partners from way back, and we’ve decided to put the bad times behind us again…”
Bin Laden’s latest promotional video, "Laden of Arabia", newly filmed in Hollywood, includes an announcement of his candidature and an endorsement of his running mate.
The fundamentalist leader adds: “Together George and I will smite the infidel in a legal and democratic fashion, just like in Iraq.”
Despite outcry from the liberal press at the President's unprecedented move, Republican media analyst Tucker Carlson predicted a landslide victory for the Bush/Bin Laden ticket, telling reporters: "Brand recognition is the key. Osama has an instantly recognisable name, and we feel sure we can turn that to our advantage. "
"Whether it be Saddam, the Ayatollah, or Bin Laden, Americans are used to enemies becoming friends and vice versa, and "If the Terminator can win California, I don't see why the Terrorist Bomber can't win Washington...”
See also : US Deploys Secret MOAB Weapon in France
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