Clinton Team Has 7-Hour Meeting To Discuss Whether Hillary Should Take Foot Out Of Mouth
By Lee Camp
NEW YORK, NY – Hillary Clinton and her staff of 712 met Tuesday to carefully plan out whether Clinton should take her foot out of her mouth, and if so, where she should place it afterward.
The meeting was in response to Clinton's interview last week in which she refused to say that homosexuals are not immoral. Her comments infuriated many in the gay community.
According to a high level staff member, one idea thrown around at the seven-hour meeting was to have Clinton claim she said "immortal" instead of "immoral." She could then state that she was simply unsure as to whether homosexual acts will last forever.
Ultimately the staff decided she should take the easy way out – claim she thought the reporter had said "bozosexual acts," which are sexual experiences with one or more clowns.
Here is a brief excerpt from her clarifying statement that will be released later today.
"I thought the reporter asked me about bozosexual acts. I of course think that homosexual acts are perfectly acceptable as long as they aren't done in crowded theaters or buses. I however think bozosexual acts are immoral in the eyes of the Lord unless they are done in a very crowded Volkswagen Bug. And even then, they must be consensual, and if it involves a silent clown or mime, then the consent must be written down on a comically large pad of paper."
Today Clinton and her staff plan to meet for 14 hours to discuss what she will wear on Friday and whether she should bring a bathing suit to Chicago when she visits next week.
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