Issue 76, 1st Feb 2007 
 WORLD NEWS
 BIGfib BOOKS
Apple Introduces iPacifier
By Alan Lord

SAN FRANCISCO - Steve Job's Apple Computer Inc. unveiled an eagerly-anticipated iPacifier mobile phone iTune-download thingy with a touch-screen whatzit on Tuesday, pushing the company's shares up as much as 8.5 percent.

"Techno-babyism rules!" yipped excitedly CEO Steve Jobs, predicting millions of new under-thirty still-living-with-Mom-n-Pop plugged-in Permanent Teen iZombies would soon be sucking their iThumbs while downloading fav iTunes, yacking to iPals about their fav reality show contestant, and updating lists of "iFriends" made on Myspace.


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