Issue 7, Thursday September 18th 2003  
Terrifying Isabel threatens to suck North Carolina off map.

The East Coast girded for the worst today as the all-powerful Isabel headed ever closer.
Forecasters said that if Isabel stays on track, she would hit those in the fragile Outer Banks of North Carolina in three days and grind on up to Chesapeake Bay.

As emergency-management officials from South Carolina to Massachusetts activated disaster plans, the Navy ordered 40 warships and submarines in Norfolk to put to sea, the Air Force ordered fighter jets at coastal bases to fly inland as far as Oklahoma and the governor of Virginia declared a state of emergency.

However at the Food Lion, Harry Boner, 30, said that even if an evacuation was ordered, he planned to ride Isabel out.
Brandishing a photo of Isabella Rossellini he told BIGfib “Sure she’s scary, she has this reputation of eating em up and spittin em out… But down this way we’re real men… I ain’t movin, I’m just sayin, come on Isabelle, make my day.”
His brother Larry told BIGfib “Yeah !”
However Isabella Rossalini interviewed exclusively for BIGfib said she’s not afraid.
“Those boys in South Carolina don’t scare me. With these lips I could suck North Carolina right off the map.”

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