Issue 57, 12th Dec 2005

Xmas Lights Surprisingly Absent
In New Orleans
By Lee Camp

With Christmas almost here, one thing stands out about the hurricane-shattered city of New Orleans: The lack of Christmas lights on and around the destroyed homes. There are many possible reasons for this lack of holiday atmosphere, but the most likely is that the citizens of New Orleans are too self-absorbed to put up their lights this year. Clearly they're too busy dwelling on spilt milk to spread the holiday cheer for others. Well, I have this question for the Big Easy: The rest of the country has moved on, why can't you? We're all quickly forgetting there ever was a Hurricane Katrina, why can't you? Our government has already moved on to dealing with more important matters, such as bridges in Alaska. So why can't you?

“still emotionally caught up”

There is certainly no lack of objects in the city on which to attach the festive lights – jagged pieces of wood, ruined vehicles of all sorts, and deserted houses abound. So why no holiday cheer Big Easy? Are you all still emotionally caught up in that hurricane/ flood/ apocalyptic destruction thing? We all know FEMA took care of your every waking need, so stop whining. I and millions of other Americans gave upwards of 80 cents apiece to help you and your city rebuild. And do you use it properly and spread the goodwill feeling of Christmas? No. You spoil it on things like food and hotel rooms in cities far from Louisiana.

“pick yourself up”

Some of you may ask why the federal government gave all the big-dollar rebuilding contracts to companies that aren't based in the troubled areas. Some of you have complained that such contracts should be given to your hometown companies, thereby pumping much needed revenue into the devastated city. But when a child breaks his leg, does his father carry him everywhere? No. A good father leaves him alone so that he will learn to pick himself up. Well, that's what the U.S. government has done for you. It's handed millions of dollars to companies that have nothing to do with New Orleans, but instead are just good friends with Bush and Cheney, thereby teaching you to pick yourself up.

“ recapture that festive spirit”

So get up off your butts, put up those Christmas lights (or Hanukkah lights – I don't want to seem insensitive), and recapture that festive spirit for which you used to be known!