New York - In diverse attempts to win the honor of hosting the 2012 Olympics, each competing city is offering new and unique enticements corresponding with their distinctive lifestyle.
New York is proposing Taxi-Hailing, Cab Dodging and Bronx Running as new competitive sports events, while Paris has proposed Speed Wine-Swilling, Boule, and the Throwing of Baguettes (replacing javelins).
To give the public a taste of Parisian life, French unions have even offered to organize a series of paralyzing strikes and demonstrations to marr the games.
All London could counter with was a guarantee of traffic jams and the gift of rubber Spitting-Image masks of Tony Blair for all Olympic participants.
Tony Blair promised however that if chosen, London would offer a Perfect Olympic Experience to Every Citizen of the World, and everyone believed him.